The Hard Times.

These past couple weeks have been really really hard for me! I debated whether to post about this or not cause it is kind of really personal. But I figured that if I posted it, maybe it could help someone else that is going through the same thing as me.
You all know about Edgar, we have become really close friends throughout the past few months... perhaps a bit too close. When I first came to college I thought every boy besides Klay was an idiot. ha but I have found that to not be so true. As much as I didn't want it to happen, I started liking Edgar more than just a friend. We started spending a lot of time together, cuddling, studying, watching movies... And i felt really really guilty about it. Because Klay does not deserve that at all. I was just a really really confused girl for a while. It is so hard to be alone all the time and I guess I just wanted to feel loved again. I have already gotten my answer that Klay is who I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with, and I am so grateful for that. But then when I started liking Edgar I was so confused because I thought I would never have feelings like that for anyone else... so I started to question mine and Klay's future. I was mad at myself for questioning it. I was mad at myself for getting even a little close to someone else. I had no idea what to do. I finally decided that I had to go to the temple, so I drove to Bountiful one day and went to the temple searching for an answer. My recommend was expired before I went, luckily my bishop was able to interview me that day, my GPS wasn't working, I drove around forever trying to find the right road, and when I got to the temple it was packed. Someone was really not wanting me to go to the temple...Satan. There were a few times I almost just went home because I was having such a hard time making it to the temple. But I knew that I had to go because I really wanted an answer to what I was supposed to do, I couldn't just sit around anymore and let things happen. While I was waiting to do baptisms, there was a bible on the seat and I picked it up. For some reason the scripture John chapter 14 came into my head. I had absolutely no idea what was going to be in this chapter but it was definitely my answer, Particularly verses 26 and 27... they say:
"But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.
Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid"
The whole time I was reading this chapter I felt sooo comforted and I knew that everything would be ok. Where it says "bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you" pretty much told me, "hey remember I have already given you your answer, Klay is the one, quit worrying." So I got that confirmation again that I am supposed to wait. Many of you are probably disappointed in me for not being so faithful to Klay, I am too. More than you could ever know. I made a big mistake and I pray that he will be able to forgive me when he gets home. But because of this, there will be none other. Me and Edgar are just friends now and that is all we will ever be. Now that I have gotten that answer I can move on and work towards being the best that I can for Klay. I want to deserve him and be ready to go to the temple with him when he gets home. I'm so grateful that I was able to go to the temple, I'm grateful that I am able to receive answers from a very loving Heavenly Father and overwhelming comfort and peace from the Holy Ghost. I know that if you have something you are struggling with you can go to the Lord in prayer and he will help you. I know that the temple is a wonderful place to be able to think and receive special answers to your hardest decisions. I love Klay. And even though I would do anything to have him here now, I love what he is doing.

"Don't let Satan put a question mark where God has already put a period"

Who You Are

This week in relief society we watched a video on YouTube called "who you are, a message to all women" and I absolutely love it. Any woman reading this, PLEASE watch it. it is so true and worth your time.

Edgar's Baptism! :)

So I have this friend, his name is Edgar. I think I have mentioned him before... and I am going to tell a story about him :) So I first met Edgar here at college, he lives a room away from me in our apartment. But I started hanging out with him and his roommates at the start of the year and we have come to be very good friends. He was catholic, but he was going to catholic church and LDS church on Sundays because he would go with his roommate Adrian (who is LDS). Well when I had the missionaries over to talk to my roommates, they asked who I always sit with on Sundays, and I told them it was Edgar and then they assumed that he was Mormon cause he always went to church, but I told them that he was catholic and they said, "Well why haven't we been teaching him???" haha so they asked if they could talk to him and I said yes and i took them over to his room. I was a bit nervous... because I didn't want him to feel like I was trying to push him into anything. But anyways, the missionaries, (Elder Samia, Elder Sizwick, Elder Silito, and Elder Sherman) continued to teach Edgar for a few months. I was able to go over sometimes when they were teaching him, and it was an awesome experience to watch them teach Edgar, and to see Edgar gain a testimony that what the missionaries were teaching was true. He prayed to know if getting baptized was the right thing to do.
And it took him a while to get an answer... but then, last Sunday I went over to their room and Edgar said, "I may or may not be getting baptized this Saturday" haha then a couple days later I asked him if he was for sure going to get baptized and he said yes and I was so happy. I was so happy that he had finally gotten that answer that he was waiting for. So Saturday Edgar became a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and was baptized. I couldn't be happier for him. Yesterday he told me that he hasn't been so happy in a long time. I know that he will be blessed because of his decision to be baptized, and great things are coming his way! I'm so glad that I was able to meet him and be a small part in his conversion. :)

Edgar and the Missionaries :) These 4 Elders became just like friends to us. They are pretty funny dudes.

Elder Silito is hilarious. He was so happy when he found out Edgar wanted him to baptize him

aw my buds (minus hayden)

Edgar and his family :) Katie is adorable.

Merry Christmas?

I already had to send Klay's Christmas presents to him!! What the? It was like October when I sent them too... it doesn't seem like it is even close to Christmas haha but it is getting there! This is the first package that I have sent Klay because they are so dang expensive to ship international! :( Which makes me so sad cause I wish I could send him goodies and fun things more, but oh well I will save money for when he gets back. haha I got him a tie, a new mission journal, his favorite pens, and candy!! :) oh and his "open when" letters were also wrapped up in Christmas wrapping paper :) It isn't much but I hope he enjoys it, I wish I could send him more!!! Merry Christmas everyone ;)

Thank the High Heavens for MAIL!

Do you believe in revelations? Cause if I said i didn't ever have any I would be a liar liar pants on fire. Today I went and checked the mail and there was nothing in it. I check it every day and there is NEVER anything in it. It is really depressing actually. So I was having a crappy day, not just cause of the mail, but there has just been a lot of stuff today that has made me really sad. I skipped my classes cause i didn't see the point in going, and i didn't want to see people today. I was doing my laundry and then when it was done I had this strong feeling to GO CHECK THE MAIL. and i thought, "what?" ha cause I had already checked it. There was nada. So I just thought whatever, and I didn't want to carry my laundry further than I had to, so i decided not to check it. Then I was going to walk out and I just really really felt like i needed to check my mail, so i checked it. And i have never been so happy to see a little white envelope in my life. It was filled with letters AND a little SD card with pictures that I loved :) My day is now wonderful. I don't even care about anything else right now. I hope my letters make him feel even a fraction of how happy I feel when I get his letters. I feel bad for him because the food in Argentina is crap. I just want to send him food haha but it would be all moldy by the time it got there. I will have to be a super good cook by the time he gets back to make up for 2 years of bad meals :) Oh boy I love him. always will. <3

All his hair gone :(

He didn't say, but I am guessing from his letters that this is Anna Marie, she just got baptized on Saturday!!

Not sure who this little girl is

he sends me random pics of their bathroom haha ok klay :)

Hey there cowboy :)

They are so nerdy :) haha

oh my that comb over. I made him promise he wouldn't do his hair like this and this is what he wrote me about it, "You need to know that I broke your rule haha! I hit a nerd streak cuz I was bored... I got a comb over yo! haha. I won't wear it like this after the mish i promise, but it scares away the serpents. so I like it cuz it lets everybody know i'm taken and established without desires of another hehe comb over! I do it out of my love for ya hehehe" oh goodness. ha

I think this is Salvador :) Klay got to baptize him.

SiSsy

This weekend Edgar, Adrian, and I took a trip to Logan to go to the USU game against USC. it was fun, the aggies are super crazy fans! we snuck into the student section and pretended that we were aggies for the night :) After the game we went to my house to see mi familia! :) It was good, my mommy had pizza waiting for us. I thought for a second that i wasn't going to be able to see my sister cause she was baby sitting, but she came home so I got to see her for a bit :) I miss her a lot. She is my best friend and it is hard to not be able to talk to her all the time. I'm glad that i have a sister, that is something that some people don't have and I feel so sorry for them. We still fight sometimes and annoy each other, but she is the person I know I can tell all of my secrets to, even when she doesn't want to hear them, and she always has my back. I love you Whitty Woo!!! :)

6 MONTHS! :)

OH MY LANTA. 6 months!! ha I can't believe we have now passed the 6 month mark. I never thought the day would come, but it did, and now that I look back at it, those 6 months went pretty fast! I just hope the next year and a half will go even faster :) It started going by much faster once I started school and was busy doing things everyday! I'm hoping that in the summer I will be working a lot so that it won't start going by slow again. Here's some things these past 6 months without Klay have taught me:
1.Oh my goodness I love him.
2. College is a pain in the butt.
3. You need the Lord in everything you do.
4. No one should be afraid to share the gospel.
5. I will never be ashamed of being a Mormon and I will always defend the things I know are true.
6. I absolutely hate buying food for myself.
7. I miss my family much more than I thought I would.
8. Sometimes you have to just stop stressing for a moment and laugh :)
9. College girls are very messy
10. I am waiting for my sweetheart for sure! (i already knew that but it hasn't changed one bit :)
One day I was sitting on campus and there were some missionaries were walking around and they stopped and talked to me for a while. One of them had a girlfriend back home, and I was talking to him about Klay a little bit :) He gave me this analogy that I thought you all would like, it makes me happy :) He said the mission is like building a house...the first 6 months are the first wall, then the pointy part of the roof is one year! The downward slope of the roof is 18 months, and the last wall is 2 years! so we only have that upward slope of the roof left and then it's all downhill from there :) ahh yeah, we got this :)  so we hit the 6 month mark on october so I'm a little late, but here's some pictures of me and my roommates chi and Denaisha celebrating 6 months!