The Hard Times.

These past couple weeks have been really really hard for me! I debated whether to post about this or not cause it is kind of really personal. But I figured that if I posted it, maybe it could help someone else that is going through the same thing as me.
You all know about Edgar, we have become really close friends throughout the past few months... perhaps a bit too close. When I first came to college I thought every boy besides Klay was an idiot. ha but I have found that to not be so true. As much as I didn't want it to happen, I started liking Edgar more than just a friend. We started spending a lot of time together, cuddling, studying, watching movies... And i felt really really guilty about it. Because Klay does not deserve that at all. I was just a really really confused girl for a while. It is so hard to be alone all the time and I guess I just wanted to feel loved again. I have already gotten my answer that Klay is who I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with, and I am so grateful for that. But then when I started liking Edgar I was so confused because I thought I would never have feelings like that for anyone else... so I started to question mine and Klay's future. I was mad at myself for questioning it. I was mad at myself for getting even a little close to someone else. I had no idea what to do. I finally decided that I had to go to the temple, so I drove to Bountiful one day and went to the temple searching for an answer. My recommend was expired before I went, luckily my bishop was able to interview me that day, my GPS wasn't working, I drove around forever trying to find the right road, and when I got to the temple it was packed. Someone was really not wanting me to go to the temple...Satan. There were a few times I almost just went home because I was having such a hard time making it to the temple. But I knew that I had to go because I really wanted an answer to what I was supposed to do, I couldn't just sit around anymore and let things happen. While I was waiting to do baptisms, there was a bible on the seat and I picked it up. For some reason the scripture John chapter 14 came into my head. I had absolutely no idea what was going to be in this chapter but it was definitely my answer, Particularly verses 26 and 27... they say:
"But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.
Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid"
The whole time I was reading this chapter I felt sooo comforted and I knew that everything would be ok. Where it says "bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you" pretty much told me, "hey remember I have already given you your answer, Klay is the one, quit worrying." So I got that confirmation again that I am supposed to wait. Many of you are probably disappointed in me for not being so faithful to Klay, I am too. More than you could ever know. I made a big mistake and I pray that he will be able to forgive me when he gets home. But because of this, there will be none other. Me and Edgar are just friends now and that is all we will ever be. Now that I have gotten that answer I can move on and work towards being the best that I can for Klay. I want to deserve him and be ready to go to the temple with him when he gets home. I'm so grateful that I was able to go to the temple, I'm grateful that I am able to receive answers from a very loving Heavenly Father and overwhelming comfort and peace from the Holy Ghost. I know that if you have something you are struggling with you can go to the Lord in prayer and he will help you. I know that the temple is a wonderful place to be able to think and receive special answers to your hardest decisions. I love Klay. And even though I would do anything to have him here now, I love what he is doing.

"Don't let Satan put a question mark where God has already put a period"